Conversations with the Unknown

It was a quiet evening, the storm had passed and the wind was no longer bellowing. A soft smell of the rain was lingering in the otherwise still night. I was sitting on the patio watching the drizzle and wetting my face with accidental rain drops but now with the showers slowing and the familiar heat back, I decided to move back into the house.

With the evening meals done and dishes washed, the kitchen was quiet. My stomach almost turned in the darkness as I flipped the light switch on. Almost on cue, there was a loud noise outside, a sort of boom, louder than a firecracker or a bullet. I had never heard a bullet so wonder how I knew that. Hell! It was louder than anything I had ever heard, so much so that the windows shattered as the glass came crashing down on the floor. I ran outside drawn to the noise, which was still reverberating through the cracks of the old house. 

Back outside, I saw the glass sitting at the edge of the patio with the last few drops of the water I was drinking trembling in fear. I looked in the front and then glanced sideways, my head moving at break neck speed to identify the source of the noise. I saw nothing, but a roving din caught my eye as I looked heaven wards to the dark and ominous sky. They looked like rain clouds, black and threatening but then they were moving too quickly. Or was it something else? A light surreptitiously moving revealed itself behind the massive expanse of smoky clouds that had almost wandered away taking the rain with them. A light, so bright; its intensity was burning my eyes. I was hypnotized, the desire to stare was powerful but the acute pain was causing my eyes to water. 

I stood there beneath the dark sky, lit only by the bright object directly above my head, the wind blowing the hair all over my face. I was in a trance, spellbound by this all-consuming, light. It was talking to me, telling me who I was. It was in my head, reading my thoughts, running through my body inching slowly in every crevice, tingling my nerves until I could no longer hold still and trembled in its wake. It was permeating my every cell causing both pleasure and pain. It was mocking me but was also showering praise. 

Who are you; I managed to ask this light. I am you, it replied. I am that, which you forgot when you entered this state. I am that which is obscured within the several layers of desire, malice and greed you have accumulated. I am your most subtle part, I am your essence.  

I lay buried within you. I am you but this clouded world has cast its shadow and hid me deep inside. You and I were once one; but now this world pulls you towards itself and you drift away not knowing me. You drift away not knowing you.
A long time ago things were different; you were different. But now you have cast a veil on your mind and hid me from your being. Your delusions have blinded you from seeing me, knowing that I am the way, the truth and the love. I knew your dreams for they were mine; they were interwoven. Alas, now this world cloaks your real dreams and has ensconced you in its reality.
We were harmony, we were bliss. We traveled the vast expanse of this universe in love, but now you prefer to live in this house. This house that will one day not hold up to the travesties of nature and be destroyed; this house that will, in the end, betray you. You love this house.
But as all grains of sand shall slowly merge with the ocean one day so shall you willingly merge with me. Until then I shall shine my light on you. Go on, weary traveler. I will await your arrival. I will await the end of your journey. And then we shall be one again.

I stood there dazed and confused, the light still shining, struggling with my mind to accept this dialogue. It spoke the truth that I knew. Then why was it so hard to approve its presence? Why could I not comfort myself and bask in its eternal shine? What pulled me towards it but also away from it? I tried hard to let go of my thoughts and flow in its formidable rhythm but the urge to stay grounded was extreme. Perhaps if I could abandon this impulse, it would be easier. I stood motionless, my mind in a conflict, torn between the two worlds until the telephone rang and the spell was broken as I turned around and headed back inside.