Nothing new to read

For a while now I have been unsuccessfully sifting through books, picking up one here, another there but nothing motivates me to finish them. I attribute this to two main reasons - 1. work is keeping me busy so by the end of the day when I am on the bus, my mind wants nothing but mindless Bollywood videos or to graze in the distant future and 2. impending motherhood has me on the edge. Nothing but sighing to the baby's movements, muttering to it and visualizing the big day is on my mind. And with just a month to go, I am happy to say it will be off my mind soon, but then the next stage will bring with it a set of challenges and thoughts, I am sure.

Yesterday was Women's Day. I don't believe in having days for things -- I understand they stand to serve a purpose but I still don't believe in them. Why not treat every day as Women's Day? Why do you need a special day to make a big deal of the transgressions and sufferings that women here, there and everywhere go through in order to survive? I was just reading a post on a blog that talked about corruption as it relates to women - apparently in Cambodia women have to pay a bribe to the cops in order to have their rape investigated. Special days like these, I know, highlight the extreme plight and conditions women have to put up with but in my humble opinion these news should be hitting the headlines every day, regardless of whether March 8 or March 9.

Becoming a mother is a blessing they say, while time will prove or disprove this in my case, I do agree that being a woman is a blessing. When I was younger, oft times I hated the fact that I was a woman. This meant I had to suffer the monthly curse, which brought with it a lot of discomfort and pain. It also meant that I had to be the victim of biased standards; while my brother got to go out and hang out with his friends, because I was a girl, I was limited for fear of what might happen to me. Some of this fear also was a fear of society. Growing up in India, regardless of what someone told you, everyone cared about what others thought of them. So a girl from a decent family, out of the house past 8pm, was quickly labeled fast and inappropriate for other well-behaved girls to hang out with. Unfortunately, this attitude still prevails and is extremely dominant in most middle class families.

While I do not deny that sexual violence is abysmal and the perpetrators should be brought to justice in any situation and any country, I often wonder what about the girls/women who live in these close minded societies? Think they are not subject to violence? Think again. Unfortunately in their case their abuse is being perpetrated, in most cases, by their parents who stop them from doing simple tasks like growing their hair out, or cutting it a certain way. They are subject to violence if they are found dating someone, if they annoy their parents or if they simply choose to do something to please themselves. What about these girls? In the name of having the "perfect girl" that can be heralded all around town when she grows up, what most parents get is a stunted woman, unable and often fearful to express her ideas and thoughts for fear of repercussions at their parents' hands. In most cases this cycle continues, only difference now is the parent is easily replaced by the husband. Some, and I am so grateful to the universe to be one of them, successfully escape and after much hard work can rotate their life around. Most are not so lucky and the life style becomes so accepted, they simply learn to live with it.

There are a lot of issues around women - while the big ones rightfully get a lot of attention, if we make women stronger at the onset perhaps, just perhaps, we would be able to get a lot further in fighting crime and ensuring justice prevails. Just a thought.