Sufi learnings

A famous Sufi master was invited to give a course in California. The auditorium was full at 8AM - the time announced - when one of the assistants came onto the stage.

The master is just waking up. Please be patient.

Time passed, and people started leaving the room. At midday, the assistant returned to the stage, saying that the master would be starting the lecture the minute he finished talking to a pretty girl he had just met. Most of the remaining audience left.

At 4PM the master appeared - apparently drunk. This time, all but 6 people stormed out.

I will teach you this, said the master, ceasing to act drunk. Whoever wishes to go down a long path must learn that the first lesson is to overcome early disappointments.

On Friday this parable, from Veronika Decides to Die, reverberated through me and I came to understand patience more. This wouldn’t have happened if a dear friend hadn’t  texted me to vent her frustration over her totally undeserved job performance review. Apparently she isn’t a ‘team player’.

During our talk she mentioned to me, much to my agreement, how with each passing day and each unfulfilling review, team lunch/dinner/drinks she was rooted more and more to the idea that the path she is on is her true calling and she is not one of the corporatey people.

That got me thinking - what if we have to walk this path to test our dedication? What if the seamless flow of knowledge, enlightenment, fulfillment, peace, whatever we seek is not too far away but will be available only to those who pass the test of patience and those who learn to overcome early disappointments? What if this path has been brought into existence to weed out all those in the audience who left when the master was still sleeping or busy talking to a pretty girl or was pissed drunk? Nature could be that master, couldn’t she? She could be throwing obstacles or delays in our way to see for how long we stay committed to our goals.

So for everyone who is in doubt, wavering or unsure, don’t give up. Nature will give us our peace, our creativity and the opportunity to make good work of it. And then, team playing will be our strongest suite and the job review will be A+!

Itchy soles

Past few days the soles of my feet have been itchy. No, I don't have fungus or anything remotely gross like that. Probably my skin crying out loud because of this damn weather that won't change but it reminded me of the omens my mother associates with itching. I know that sounds weird, but I promise its getting better. If you were to tell her, "Ma, my sole is itchy." She would say, "You will travel." If you say, my right palm is itchy, she would say you will come into money. I can't remember what happens when your left palm is itchy.

Anyway, so I had some time to burn and was curious so I set off to discover if besides travel, itchy soles meant anything else. One person had asked the same question and said I know when the palm is itchy, it means I will come into money. What do itchy soles mean? The reply -- it means money will walk away from you. Easy come, easy go. LOL!

I moved on.

Believe it or not, I then stumbled upon a list of omens where the slighest itch on your body signifies something. Some of them are quite funny so I am sharing them here. If you know of any other such quirky omens, feel free to share!

An itchy crown of the head
You will have an advance in position.
An itchy right cheek
Someone is speaking well of you.
An itchy left cheek
Someone is speaking poorly of you.
An itchy right eye or eyebrow
You will have a meeting with an old friend.
An itchy left eye or eyebrow
You will have a great disappointment.
An itch in the Inside of the nose
You will meet trouble and sorrow
An itchy outside of the nose
You will be annoyed, cursed, kissed or meet with a fool soon.
Itchy lips
Someone is saying something disrespectful to you.
Itchy back of the neck
There will be an illness in your family.
An itchy right shoulder
You will discover a legacy.
An itchy left shoulder
You will discover sorrow.
An itchy right elbow
You will get exciting news.
An itchy left elbow
You will get meet news and losses.
An itchy right palm
You will gain some money.
An itchy left palm
You will loose some money.
An itchy spine
You will have a disappointment.
Itchy loins
You will make amends after an argument.
An itchy stomach
Someone will offer you food.
Itchy thighs
You will find somewhere else to live.
An itchy right knee
You will have a happy journey.
An itchy left knee
Your journey will be troubled with bad luck.
Itchy shins
You will have an unpleasant surprise.
Itchy ankles
You will be married or increase your wealth.
An itchy sole of the right foot
You will have a profitable journey.
An itchy sole of the left foot
You will encounter losses on your journey.

Purpose

Once in a while a thought arises

That brings to mind the word "purpose"

What shall I do when on this Earth?

What is my purpose?

When I was growing up I was told

Fancy stories that would encourage me

No prince featured in these tales

It was always about my endeavour

Change the world, you will

Bring change to your homeland

As the years go by in your life

Your purpose will be brought to light

I wonder the truth behind those tales

Will they ever be deciphered

Or did I make other choices

That have altered the course of my life?

Does purpose really matter?

Or happiness in your current state is all important?

Why do I feel a void despite "everything"?

Why is there emptiness despite joy?

I look to the universe again for answers

But there is only black silence to be found

Some day in this life time I hope

My plea is heard

Not to change the world I say

But give me the joy of changing lives

A little voice speaks inside of me

You have already started that, it says

Keep your work going

And don't look to the heavens for answers

Come back here often and learn to chat

So your purpose shall be revealed

The magic of dreams

This past Saturday there was a lot of discussion in class about dreams. Started off with a dream I had where there were a lot of snakes on the ground sitting up – my vision centered on one that was brown in color. Then the dream ended. Curious to know the meaning I asked George (guruji) to shed some light on it. Snakes mean a variety of things but what I didn’t know is they represent Mother Nature, i.e. the female energy in the universe. I knew snakes meant sexual energy but didn’t know that the maternal instinct is also represented through the snake. Then we continued on with where we had left off last time and started off with dreams.

We talked about how when we dream they are so real and in that state we are unwilling to believe anyone who tells us this indeed is a dream. The mind makes them real but how do we have a memory of the dream? Vedanta tells us that when asleep the mind is cut off from the world, meaning, there is no connection to this world of illusion and we are in that consciousness state. So what remembers we were dreaming and the contents of the dream? The consciousness does. As in the waking state, the consciousness – the supreme spirit that resides in all of us – quietly witnesses everything and remembers everything. So it got me thinking – is it possible that the consciousness stirs up memories of past lives or helps us see the future, whatever small glimpse?

A lot of us work things out in our dreams; we find answers to problems, get out of sticky situations and sometimes avert danger due to the things we dream. But could it be that sometimes our dreams show us glimpses of the past or warn us of any impending changes in our life?

Case in point, I was talking to Mom this morning and she told me – she and her coworker both dreamt that their boss was fired and she could sense a change coming to their department. How can two people have the exact same dream the same night?

Last night I dreamt I was in a building, what looked like the 7^th floor and it collapsed. I was in there with a few cousins and my brother and when the building came down; I remember hugging my brother and my cousin to each arm as if protecting them from any falling debris. All 3 of us successfully came out of the crash and the last thing I saw was us walking the streets of that town. Then the dream ended. A friend told me this morning it could represent escapism or being unhappy with a situation. But the coming out alive could also denote successfully fighting any problems. Then this morning, a close friend from India emailed me. In her dream she saw me in a lot of pain and she was so troubled she woke up and emailed me to make sure I was ok. I was fine but in my dream apparently I was fighting something. How did she know something was wrong? I refuse to believe this was a mere coincidence but of course don’t have the vision to understand anything more.

Are dreams connected? Meaning, if we were to keep a tab on them would we see a pattern? Is there a story being narrated or a message the universe is sending us? Or is it just a bunch of baloney our brain is subjecting us to in a state of sleep? Somehow I am inclined to believe the former.

Learnings from a new class

Due to President's Day, the church where Vedanta classes are normally held was closed so this past Saturday, we met at our teacher's apartment in the city. Let me start by saying that it was not at all what I expected. Better or worse? Well, just different, but then again what did I expect. The man is practically an Indian so it should have come as no surprise when I stepped into the door and could smell the familiar incense. Walking through the hallway, I was amazed at the art he had on the walls - various Indian decor, small idols of various Gods, Buddha paintings in the living room. There was a wall to wall library with every conceivable book on India, along with various religious paintings. George (teacher) walked me over to one stand in the living room that had a temple on it, made of wood. This wood he told me he picked up from various spots in the city, that people throw away from construction or other activities. The left over wood he then carved into a variety of forms to create a beautiful temple. I took a picture but due to improper lightning it may not show the best image. Nevertheless, I must share the intricate art work he did.

George then showed me an another temple that was constructed out of beads, that he painstakingly painted and put together. The decor, deities and paintings were perhaps to be expected but such beautiful artwork I really did not expect. Shortly thereafter, we were joined by other students and the class began.

Picking up where we left last week - we talked about discrimination against the pranamaya kosa or the vital-air-sheath. The pranamaya kosa does not have consciousness but consciousness comprises of the vital air sheath. The prana's primary function is to vitalize the mind and intellect and is the single faculty that binds our subtle body to our gross body. So it acts like a glue.

Next up is the manomaya kosa or discrimination against the mind. The most important thought in the mind is the "I" thought. All subsequent thoughts and actions are a result of this I thought. If in an individual, the I thought were to collapse, the mind would collapse and so would the world. The concept of "I-nes"s and "my-ness" are born and maintained in the manomaya kosa. All these I thoughts are witnessed by the consciousness. So the thoughts of my mind, my body, my intellect, my wife, my husband, my this and my that are all born and festered in the manomaya kosa.

Manomaya kosa pervades the pranamaya kosa, just as pranamaya kosa pervades the annamaya kosa. The mind can only perceive those things that are already known. What I do not know, I cannot think about. For that, we have the intellect.

The mind cannot be controlled unless we control our sense organs. So we should get away from sense objects in order to quieten the sense organs. There are two ways to do that - taking the stance of consciousness -- so constantly reinforcing the idea that you are the consciousness and everything else is a mirage or by practicing self-control. This would mean to not let anything create an imprint on the mind. (Of course a mixture of the two methods can also be practiced).

If you realize 'I AM' everything in this universe has an uncanny way of taking care of itself. The key is to drop the worry and let the universe work everything out for itself. Everything gets integrated but we are too busy worrying and pondering to let the universe work its magic.

Next up is Maya -- the illusion that this world is. All avidya or ignorance is Maya. Avidya is the cause of mind, a phenomenon that unlike the mind is not subject to time. Avidya veils the Atman and the result is the projection of the mind. To give an example, avidya is saying I don't know that that is a rope. The projection it causes as a result is the illusion of a snake. This is Maya. We superimpose the mind on the Atman and the result is a veiled approach to everything we see and do.

Therefore to get out of this rut, there is only one way - stop the churning, stop the mind, quieten it with anyway that best works for you.

Final thought of the day - before studying the world, study yourself. So don't criticize anything to see in someone else. Take care of yourself first before passing judgement on anyone else. That will be some exercise for the mind.

Stirring up responsibility, sadness & ethics

I cannot say Never Let Me Go is a bad book, no not at all, but I cannot even say it’s a book that everyone will enjoy. Firstly, it’s a story about relationships – the story of 3 friends who go through the same experiences but have different reactions to it. Yes, there is a suspense to it that although doesn’t shock you (partly because of the way it’s introduced) does make you uncomfortable if society were to reach such inhumane levels. The rate at which we are going though, it wouldn’t be surprising if such experiments were already underway.

It’s a sensitive story that by the end doesn’t make you sob but feels you leaving despondent. Kathy, the narrator sums up the feeling aptly when she says though the tears are free flowing, she isn’t sobbing. It’s a story about things we do even when we know the outcome won’t go our way, holding on to a feeling that maybe things will change, perhaps there is a way out, even when reality is staring us in the face. We have all been there, its human nature to hold on to hope and even at the cost of whopping disappointment we wouldn’t change that approach. Perhaps that’s just the way we are wired. I am sure there are practical people who view this world as either black or white but when it comes down to something they care about or losing someone they love, somehow that quintessential hope creeps in. I don’t think anyone is immune from it or devoid of it.

That said the story also stirs up some ethical discussion. It talks about how we choose to ignore what is ethically wrong if it promises to keep us or our loved ones safe. Take the case of Gitmo – as long as those inmates are not on US soil and we are safe and protected who cares if they are being water boarded or worse. At least they are in the shadows, not in front of us everyday reminding us of what is wrong with our world and for many reasons how far into violence we have plunged it. We talk about it for a day or two but eventually when it makes us uncomfortable we push it in the background and move on with our life as if nothing has happened.

Same is the case with the planet – we know Earth is in peril and if she decides to show her real face we are in big, big trouble. But in this case we don’t want to do anything until we are forced to. Why wait for a government or a nation or the world to do something? Why not do it because we are citizens of this Earth and keeping her from harm is our responsibility, just as we keep our children and our families safe? When will our I’s and mine’s become large enough to encompass not just our families but the wider notion of everything around us that we depend on? We plunder Earth for her resources but when it comes to being responsible for her we want no part in it. Really, how selfish can we be? Shove all the save the planet talk in the background but hey if you increase the price of that oil, I will be up in arms. Can’t we see that ultimately it’s all connected?

So if you like sensitive stories without happy endings, give Never Let Me Go a chance. Incidentally, the British made a movie of it too starring Keira Knightley & Carey Mulligan, not sure yet if I am keen on it.

Keeping in line with the somber tone, I have started Veronika Decides to Die, a Paulo Coehlo story, about a 24 year old woman who decides to die because of everything that is wrong with the world. More on that soon.

For now, enjoy the long weekend and the fleeting sunshine.

What a bad night’s sleep does to you! (Or I think maybe the reason)

Compounded by the late realization that I didn’t sleep well last night I got a chance to reflect on my morning. Yeah well, it wasn’t that bad but it was different – a few things didn’t go my way and I reacted in perhaps not the best way. I know better and disappointment reigns supreme.

First I missed the shuttle – the growing number of residents in my condo means more people trying to take the shuttle to transport themselves to the ferry/bus stop. Normally if you are down by 7.20 you are assured a seat for the 7.30 departure. Well, today that didn’t happen. So first reason to lose my cool.

Eventually I left, boarded a bus right away and things were looking up. I got on the bus to sit next to an older lady, well not so old, older than me lady. So I tell her excuse me so she could move the bag on the seat and she goes into slow motion. I am standing there and she takes foreverrrr to move this damn bag. Finally I sit down and adjust myself when she decides she needs to zip up her bag. So she moves her elbow all the way out almost stabbing my chest with it. OK, breath, breath, breath.

I wait for her to finish her little dance so I can put my lunch pail in the counter space behind the seat and between the windows. Just when I decide to do so, this lady wants to get up and sit back down – for no reason whatsoever and in the process elbows me hard. Strike 3 and I am done! I look at her and go “OK, what is the problem. Why are you pushing me around?” She looks at me innocently and says “I didn’t, I didn’t push you.” Yeah whatever. I just shake my head and look at the lady sitting across from me whose smile tells me she saw it all unfold. The rest of the ride was smooth (maybe because I made a stink) but it got me thinking what if I hadn’t lost my cool? In the battle of my mind and myself, clearly my mind won.

Walking to work I start thinking of how I could have better handled it. I could have just not said anything – well that’s not the most appropriate way though. Being kind and showing compassion doesn’t mean you let others walk all over you. You should stand up for your right – that is your dharma – but in a positive way. So maybe telling her nicely to stop pushing me around would have been a better way to go. I got angry and perhaps because of that I am still carrying her around. Not cool.

A conversation I had with my aunt this weekend reminded me I still have hope. Her yoga teacher told her whenever she let her mind win she simply had to tell herself she failed. And that meant she would get another chance to redeem herself. Awareness is the first step, patience the key.